generally, i would be an advocate of the ‘honesty is the best policy’ credo. seriously. but on occasion, there is cause to tell a little white lie, a fib, or perhaps just withhold information from someone. one’s reason for doing this could be to protect someone from unnecessary sorrow, embarrassment or anger. in the case of the latter, i should hazard a guess that one would actually be protecting one’s self from someone else’s anger! nevertheless, there are many reasons for lying or keeping a secret, some good, some not so good.
as my lovely wife has most gently and subtly reminded me, i have kept several secrets from her over the years… and they were doozies! thankfully my secrets are based on love and are designed for a joyous response, rather than based on hate, designed for causing pain and hurt. so here are my top three secrets!
1) it was december 25th 2004 and chantal was spending christmas with me and my family in canada. we were still doing the long-distance thing and it had started to wear thin a while ago. long story short, i proposed to chantal that christmas day and it couldn’t have been more perfect. aside from my nerves and a minor amount of fumbling around (and a little bit of voice crackage), it was truly a surprise that was pulled off exceedingly well. i had been discussing and then planning it for a few months with my family, so they knew about it, but no one else did. i was surprised how when the moment was finally upon me to ‘step up to the plate’, how nervous i was! i think that reality hit home that there was a small chance she’d think i was totally nuts and perhaps so no!
2) on may 28th 2004, i arrived at therry’s (chantal’s mom) studio for lunch, in dublin city centre, where chantal and therry were enjoying each other’s company over tea and biscuits. however, chantal had no idea that i was going to be there. none at all. as far as she was concerned, i was in toronto, working. she had only spoken to me hours earlier, but didn’t know that i was on my way to the airport! what made this so special, was that chantal had been going through a particularly tough time with her health and really needed me to be there for her. and it was my birthday! oh yeah, and therry was in on the surprise from the start.
3) i secretly got a really cool, new bicycle for chantal last year, for her birthday (october 12, 2010). she had been without a bike for a few years and really missed cycling, so i thought that the timing was right to get her back out on the streets (jeez, that sounds bad). she had no idea and i absolutely love seeing the joy on her face when she is truly surprised… and happy that whatever secret i had been keeping was a pretty good one.
so, it’s okay to have a secret every now and then. just try to remember that honesty truly is the best policy.